Because programming isn't like a river, but it damn well ought to be.

Homespring, or HOtMEfSPRIbNG, is short for "Hatchery Oblivion through Marshy Energy from Snowmelt Powers Rapids Insulated but Not Great".

Homespring was the very first metaphor-oriented programming language. These days, of course, there are many others to choose from. Or there will be. Or something.

The Homespring programming language was invented by Jeff Binder, who also wrote the original language standard, in 2003. Joe Neeman updated the standard in 2005 to go along with his improved Homespring interpreter. The documentation is available here: http://bunny.xeny.net/linked/Homespring-Proposed-Language-Standard.pdf.